Natalie Portman - Closer

Natalie Portman
in Closer

One of her classics. Classic "Huh?" movies, that is. You thought the threat in The Phantom Menace was obscure, well figuring out why anyone made this movie with Natalie in the role of a stripper in a purple wig just makes me scratch my head and go "Huh?". Kind of like Garden State. Sure, you get to see her in her underwear jumping into a pool, but the other 101 minutes is unfortunately counted amongst the time I will never get back in my life.

But I can feel a big digression coming on that would lead us to other Really Great Movies like Addicted to Love (the only bad movie Meg Ryan did until she turned into a cheating so-and-so (family blog!) and left Dennis Quaid. Seriously. She was perfect before she became a cradle robbing tramp. Now I can never look at her the same.). So I'll stop now and keep talking about Natalie Portman in Closer.

Purple haired stripper. All you need to know.

But not even the good kind of stripper that actually, well, strips it all off.

Well, I guess there's not much more to be said. Natalie did the whole Padme thing, and I'll be featuring her in an upcoming compilation of hot colored women from Star Wars (or just hot women, I haven't decided yet), so I won't be posting any pics of her in her white makeup just yet.

Here's a couple of other great shots from a fashion magazine. The first one is, well, I'm not sure what it is.And the second shot is apparently some sort of 8-bit seductress look.

Happy Easter!

Rihanna - Last Girl on Earth

Rihanna
Last Girl on Earth

If Rihanna was the last girl on Earth, and she was purple, would you do her?

Duh.

Now, I don't hold truck with today's pop musicians. I couldn't tell you what her music sounded like, or what her videos were like, but when I came across this picture of her (...) I just had to share.

I tried uploading a video of her to the BCAH Youtube, but her lawyers gave me a cease and desist (it was from some show in South America where she was purple on stage) so if you must see her dancing around all purple, find her yourself. The whole episode kind of put me off big stars and their fancypants lawsuits. I was debating even posting this after that happened, but I am short of blue chicks this week so here ya go.

Featured Artist - J. Scott Campbell

Magnificient. Er, Maleficient.

Featured Artist - J. Scott Campbell
Official Site
Deviantart

This is the guy who ruins the Fairy Tales for ya. Yep, you'll never see Alice again without thinking about J. Scott Campbell's Alice. Or The Wicked Witch. Or The Little Mermaid. This is the guy who dresses them up as they should be - hot, sleek and ready to do Never Never Land. Or is that Never Never..., oh, never mind. You get the idea. So without further ado, here are a couple of beauts.

Alice in Wonderland. I wish I was that mushroom.

The Wicked Witch of OMGoz

The Little *ahem*maid

Besides ruining the above fairy tales for you, J Scott also will ruin a couple of your favorite already-hot hotties if you're not careful. How many of us have lusted after Mary Jane? And appreciated Todd for his amazing rendition, along with Erik Larsen? And yeah, I have to admit, I'm a sucker for Kirsten Dunst and even though she ain't a natural redhead, she did a fair job of pulling off MJ.

But...guh.

Crime, I'm afraid you're going to have to wait when I'm Spider-Man

And she's been done so many times and in so many ways...but I had to share this version with you.

Not your daddy's Slave Princess Leia. I wonder how many young boys would have imploded in 1983 if this was what Lucas dished up to us. Times have changed, indeed. Thankfully! So another one he's done that isn't going to ruin her, is Jessica Rabbit. And I guess in his version she counts as a red chick?

So anyway, I am so in love with this guy's art that I don't even really care who he is. Go look him up if you want more. And trust me, you want more.

Never say Never, James

She-Hulk - Jennifer Walters

"Please let me slip on this ice. PLEASE let me slip on this ice!"

She-Hulk
Jennifer Walters - Marvel

The hot female counterpart to the Hulk. Bush ain't the only one who know something about preemptive strikes. In 1980, Stan Lee and Marvel decided to publish their own She-Hulk in case the TV Network showing The Incredible Hulk decided to go all Lindsey Wagner on them and come up with a She-Hulk that Marvel couldn't control. So in this day and age, it was inevitable, like Super Girl and all the other poor female characters who owe their existence to their male counterpart. I want to make a character named Man-Man so when the TV show spins off they have to name their hero "Man-Woman". It could cater to a whole slew of new readers waiting for their hero(ine) to come along. But I digress.

"Why Bruce! That IS Incredible"

So I guess they wanted to make sure they never had to delve into the whole "Hulk and She-Hulk should totally hook up!" meme that would inevitably ensue in every geek forum from here to a certain nuclear testing ground. So they made the new and improved, female version of the Hulk into Bruce Banner's cousin. NON-kissing cousin, my friends in the south. She got shot by a crime boss (pesky crime bosses, always creating new super heroes by mistake), and Bruce happened to be in town (pesky coincidences, always moving the plot forward...). So he transfused his blood to save her life, and voila! She-hulk was "born".

So should Bruce Banner go to jail for knowingly passing his blood, in full tainted condition, to someone else?

Anyway, She-Hulk went on to battle lots of foes and acquit herself worth of being a super-hero in her own right, male-derived pseudonym notwithstanding.

I  waiting for the "What If?" story where Jennifer and Bruce don't know they are cousins when he gives her the transfusion. They could hire George to write that one.

She-Man? Spider-Hulk?

Anyway, She-Hulk is one of those better known babes, so there's lots of happy images of her in skimpy clothes all over the web. This is just a taste for ya. Hope you enjoyed!

Forbidden

Forbidden

April Fool!

For those of you that tuned in yesterday to the luscious blue beauty by AnneMarie, fear not. That was merely an April Fool's day post. Yesh, I do not rank her work with the likes of Aayla Secura or that hot blue Andorian chick. And to apologize, I give you four reasons to keep viewing Blue Chicks Are Hot - the Blonde, the Brunette, the Red Head, and the Purple Head from the above picture.

I'm not a-gonna tell you who the artist is, because his work is awesome and I'm going to feature him in May as our Featured Artist of the Month (yea, sorry, it's a long wait but I already got someone ahead of him for April and I'm too lazy to change the order of the posts. Sue me.).

So, if you want to look it up yourself, go ahead. Otherwise, just be patient and you will be rewarded.

Blue Female - Annemarie McCambridge

Blue Female
Acrylic by Annemarie McCambridge

The hot blue chick in this acrylic painting by Annemarie McCambridge is one of her finer pieces. She does surgery paintings as well. Not exactly sure why, but the one with the view of the doctors looking down from the perspective where you are the patient...little creepy. Even for me. But the blue chick - I would compare her to Aayla Secura, or maybe that hot blue Andorian chick by Chonastock.

I like her style in this - it is more evocative than most of her other works.

Notice the use of the darker hues to denote the shadows on the body, fading into the darkened background. It's a great use of chiaroscuro, if I ever saw one. And the lines are sexy like noone's business.

I highly recommend this artist if you're looking for something to hang on your wall.

I'll leave you with "Last Thing I Saw".